A Time of Change...

I thought that I knew the direction my life was heading. Ultimately west, closer to family; however, a turn has come and we are now heading east, Jacksonville, Florida. It all seems like a blur, the last week. A week ago Friday, Jason came in the room and told me he had just had a call with his boss' boss. (not a good sign) He asked him to consider taking the FL job. They were having problems clear back in the fall and asked him to take it last Dec. At that time I felt sick inside. They were not going to help us relocate or anything. He declined the offer and accepted another assignment that would possibly take us west. We were thrilled. Now he was once again being plead with to take the job. Things in FL were not going well with the client and they needed someone to help get things back on track. Now they were desperate and willing to help get him there and help with some other things too.

When Jason told me about the job, I cried...all day. We had not decided to take it but we also found out that the job he was hoping to take us west would most likely stay in the east anyhow. I felt frustrated and after a day of tears decided I needed to know what we were to do. We talked to his boss about the concerns we had about taking it...higher cost of living, the lack of bonus' this year and the fur-low his work had done had financially hurt us last year and we are so financially tight right now. Also, the fact we hadn't been home in two years because of finances, concern about the house selling and having two mortgage payments would kill us. In the end his boss said they would relocate us, would raise his salary a little to start and then add a larger increase after he reached some projection goals. They also would help pay up to 6 months rent while we waited to sell the house. On top of that they would give him a signing bonus that would enable us to go home this summer. We talked and prayed all weekend. I felt really good about it on Sat. but wanted Jason to know for himself what we should do so I waited to tell him what my answer was. He had flown out to FL Sunday and finally Mon. I told him we've got to give them an answer, he needed one. He called me late Mon. and said there was no thunderbolt answer but that he felt good about it. I was glad, now even though torn, at least we had a direction and peace about what we should do.

It's been hard with him gone. He was home Friday, that time went so fast and now he is gone again. Last night was horrendous as Luke was ill with a stomach bug. We have two people coming to see the house on Mon. after almost a year of not a single person. So hope is on the horizon, now we just have to get through the rest.

Our plan is to move after school gets out. That will give me time to pack up thing and tie up loose ends. It's only about 8 weeks away so I'm trying not to stress, but it is stressful. We plan to drive out to FL for spring break starting Sat. and be out there with Jason for a week. The kids have missed him so much. Sarah would break my heart when she talked to him on the phone saying "I miss you, daddy!" in a pitiful voice and telling him she wants to move to FL to live with him. None of this is easy, but I'm trusting that Heavenly Father knows what we need to do and will help us all along the way. I have such a wonderful husband and I miss him very much. They will be releasing him from bishop pretty soon and that will be a relief for him. It's hard to work out the needs of a ward when you are only home on Sat. and at church a few hours at the most before flying out. He had a funeral last week and his poor counselor (only counselor as the other one just moved) had to jump in and help take care of things. It'll be really good when things are all done and we don't have to separate each week.